This article lists the best 10 tips you will ever receive about how to fail in relationships. Paying great attention to them is a sure way to understand how to keep sabotaging your relationships over and over again. Read and internalize with the fullest attention.1. Never take responsibility for your part in the failure of your relationships. Always blame your partners. Taking responsibility shows that you too might be wrong. This can take away some of the respect and love your partner feels towards you. Being sure you are always right is the best way to prove your integrity and show how strong you are!2. Don’t ever try to get in touch and understand the needs which might drive you to sabotage your relationships. Trying to understand what might drive you to sabotage your relationships means that you don’t know yourself 100%. It means you don’t know “who you truly are.”In today’s world, where “knowledge is power”, not knowing “who you are” is a weakness. You can’t allow yourself to believe and assume you have personal needs you are not aware of which might drive you to harm your relationships.There is no reason for you to even consider the possibility that you have needs which cause you to sabotage your relationships (such as: the need to always be in control which drives your partners away from you; the need to always get attention and love which makes you too dependent on your partners; the need to always be “right” which makes you an unpleasant and stubborn person, and so on).3. Don’t even attempt to realize and understand the fears that control you and drive you to sabotage your relationships. It doesn’t make sense that you have fears you are unaware of which harm your relationships. It is certain that you realize your fears and know how to combat them. If you are unsuccessful in your relationships it is not due to fears. There is no reason to suspect you of having fear of commitment (which might drive you to escape from each and every relationship you begin to develop); fear of being alone (which might drive you to jump into a relationship with whoever blinks at you); fear of losing your independence (which drives you to be controlling with your partners); fear of being hurt (which might drive you to be cautious with your partners causing you to never dare to open up), and so on. No. Don’t let anyone suspect you have fears you are unaware of which cause you to sabotage your relationships!4. Don’t ever check whether your expectations from partners and relationships are unrealistic. It is great to have expectations! It is also natural to expect your partner to be there for you all the time; to love you unconditionally; to always understand you; to always remember your birthday. It is great to expect that you and your partner will always be in a good mood; will always be sexually attracted to one another, and so on.If you find out that your expectations are not fulfilled – that your partner doesn’t fulfill them! – it is not your fault! You have done nothing wrong! There is no reason for you to contemplate whether your expectations are unrealistic and try to modify them. If your relationship fails, there is no reason to suspect your expectations did any damage to it. Just find another partner!5. Believe in your fantasies and make sure they materialize! Fantasies are part of life. They give you something to dream about, something to look forward to. Where will you be without your fantasies? The more fantasies you have about partners and relationships the richer your relationship can be! Together with your partner you can reach the highest sky!Fantasize that your love will be just like in the movies. That your partner will supply all your needs. That the two of you will do everything together and never fight. That you will always agree on everything.Hang on to your fantasies! Let no one tell you they are unrealistic! They are part of “who you are” – of your perception of reality, of the way you approach love and relationships. Don’t ever give them up!6. Remember that you are always right! Whenever conflicts and arguments arise between you and your partner, never think – not even for a minute – that your partner may be right, and never ever compromise! Compromises in life indicate weakness, and once you compromise your partner might use it against you time and again in the future. You need to be assertive, even aggressive, knowing what you want and how to pursue it. Never succumb! If your partner doesn’t like it – it’s your partner’s problem, not yours!OR, by the same token -7. Always be submissive; compromising; giving in; allowing abuse; loving and understanding. Never allow yourself to do and express what you want to see taking place between you and your partner. Never express a different idea to your partner’s. Never refuse to do what your partner wants. The more you are there for your partner without any mutuality, the better it is for the relationship.8. Always react towards your partner and behave the same way you have in past relationships. Prove to yourself that you are consistent. That you don’t change from one relationship to another. There is no reason to choose different reactions and behaviors with different partners. If your past relationships failed it isn’t because something you did or not; it is more likely because something your partner did. Or maybe “the time wasn’t right”; or you were “too busy pursuing your career”, and so on. So there is no reason for you to devote time to thinking what to do differently in a future relationship. 9. Never try to change anything related to “who you are” and the way you behave in a relationship. The process of growing up has taken you years to arrive at where you are. During the years you have unconsciously learned and internalized (from your parents; the society you grew up in; books, movies, fairy-tales and more) a belief-system, a perception of reality; messages about love and relationships.In your adult life you continue to hang on to these. And this is fine. There is no reason for you to give them up. No reason to attempt to change anything you carry on with you for so many years. You are doing just fine. If your relationship fails, that’s too bad, but it isn’t a reason for you to begin doubting yourself or begin to “work” on finding out what has driven you to fail. Things happen, sometimes more than once.10. Resist, fight and reject any advice/suggestion to develop self-awareness.Self-Awareness is something only “losers” develop; only those who “don’t find themselves”; only those who “are not certain about themselves.”If you know who you are; if you appreciate yourself; if you feel you have a fine level of self-esteem – why develop Self-Awareness? It can only make your partner doubt your integrity; your strength; your stability.There is no reason for you to become aware of the ways in which you keep sabotaging your relationships time and again. Avoid any temptation to get to know and understand yourself better. Be and stay “who you are”. After all, consistency in life is a virtue!
What Is a Hard Money Loan and How It Works?
A hard money loan refers to a type of loan. However, what makes it different from other types of loans is that it’s secured on real property. Moreover, they are considered short-term bridge or last resort loans. Basically, they are used in different real estate transactions. The lenders are either companies or individuals, not banks. Read on to know more.
Key Takeaways
Given below are some of the salient features of these loans.
Primarily, they are used for real estate transactions. And this money comes from a company or individual instead of a bank.
Typically, this type of loan is granted for a short period of time. The purpose is collect money quickly at a lower ration of LTV and higher cost.
Since these loans are not executed traditionally, the funding time is reduced is usually quite quick.
It’s interesting to note that the terms of these loans are negotiated between the borrower and the lender. Plus, these loans use the real estate as collateral.
Although repayment may result in default, they still leave a lot of profit for the lender.
How does a Hard Money Loan Work?
Usually, the terms of hard money loans are based on the value of the real estate, not the borrower’s creditworthiness. Since conventional lenders like banks are not the lenders, private lenders or firms are most interested in this business.
Also, these loans may be a good choice for property flippers who have plans to renovate a property and sell it again. Here you may be thinking the cost of this type of loan is quite high. But the good thing is that the extra cost is offset by the loan will be paid off rather quickly. In most cases, the loan is granted for a period of 1 to 3 years. Aside from this, they offer a lot of advantages as well.
Aside from this, this type of loan is considered a great investment as well. You can find a lot of people out there who have done this business and are happy with the practice.
Special Considerations
Typically, unlike the bank financing or the financing programs offered by government, the cost of these loans is quite higher for a typical buyer. However, this cost reflects the higher risk that the loan granter bears. But the great thing is that the extra cost is a worth it as the money is available quickly. The approval process is less stringent and the repayment schedule is also quite flexible.
Also, these loans can be a great choice to deal with turnaround situations. For instance, if you need money quickly for a short-term financing but you have poor credit score, you can give it a go. Since the amount is issued pretty quickly, you can use the funds to stave off a foreclosure, for instance.
Pros and Cons
Now, let’s take a look at some pros and cons of hard money loans.
Pros
First of all, the approval process is quite faster unlike the process of mortgage or a conventional loan. The thing is that private lenders are interested in this type of business as they can make decisions quickly without running a lot of checks. In other words, they won’t check your credit history. These are the steps that slow down the process and make the borrower wait for weeks.
Typically, these investors only care about the repayments. Plus, they have the opportunity to resell the property in case the borrower fails to make payments and becomes a defaulter.
Another advantage is that the lenders don’t apply the conventional underwriting process. Instead, they evaluate all of the cases one by one. Often, applicants can sit with the lender and discuss the repayment schedule based on their circumstances. Aside from this, borrowers can take advantage of a lot of opportunities during the time they have. So, this is another great advantage you can enjoy if you go for this option.
Cons
Since the real estate is used as a security against default, these loans feature lower LTV rations unlike the regular loans. This ration is between 50 and 70% unlike the ration of regular loans, which is 80%. However, if you are an experienced flipper, it can be even higher.
Aside from this, the interest rates of these loans are higher as well. For subprime loans, the rate of interest can be even higher. In 2019, for instance, the rates of hard money loans were between 7.5 and 15% based on the period the loan is granted for. By contrast, the prime interest rate was only 5.25% in the same period.
Another disadvantage is that these lenders may not offer loans against owner-occupied property because of compliance rules and regulatory oversight.
Hope, now you understand what hard money loans are and the pros and cons associated with them. For more information, you can consult your mortgage broker.
Starting A Photography Business: A Structured Approach For Success
Starting a photography business seems easy to begin with. All one needs is a good camera, an understanding of photography techniques, a love for photography itself, and the enthusiasm to turn a passionate hobby into a business.Unfortunately, it really isn’t as simple as that!The moment a talented amateur photographer makes the decision to become a professional, to earn money from their photographs, he or she ceases to be a photographer and instead becomes a marketer and seller of photography.The distinction between photographer and businessperson is crucial and understanding of this is essential if the would-be professional has a desire to be successful at selling their photographic work.Put simply, photographers do not make money taking photographs. They make money selling photographs.Sadly, the ease of entry into the photography business is so simple that many photographers find themselves asking the question, “how do I start a photography business” after they’ve already discovered that the reality is not as simple as they thought it would be after all!For those who are new to the photography business, or considering making the jump from being an amateur to professional photographer, there is a structured approach that could save some agony further down the line. This systematic methodology is called “The Six Pillars Of Success” and can apply to almost any small business.The six pillars are:
Mindset
Positioning
Marketing
SEO
Sales
Client relationships
MindsetBeing in business is not for the faint-hearted or thin-skinned. Because of this, it’s essential to maintain a positive mindset and keep your business goals firmly in sight. Commitment is a big factor here, too, and it’s important to be 100% committed to your success no matter the current circumstances. This also means investing in your continuing business education, and having a forward-thinking mentality that’s focused on your future growth.PositioningKnowing where to position oneself in the marketplace is something that will set the aspiring professional photographer apart from the competition. Identifying a photographic genre as a specialty, together with the demographic and personality of the ideal target client are a great start here. A pricing model also helps to determine which of those ideal clients will be willing to invest in the photography services and products on offer.MarketingIn its most simple form, marketing is the process of earning, and competing for, your ideal clients’ attention. Effective marketing helps to educate your photography prospects about who you are, your values and beliefs, how you conduct business, and how the client can most benefit from the experience of working with you.SEOSearch engine optimization (SEO) is critical to the success of any business in this day and age. A photographer might be the most personable and friendly person in the world and produce the most incredible photography their clients could possibly imagine, but that won’t matter one bit if no one can find them online. Even with the most amazing-looking photography website, it’s essential to ensure that the search engines have a good idea of what the website is actually about.SalesNo one wants to come across as the stereotypical used-car salesman, and if the client senses the photographer might be uncomfortable with his or her own prices or at all nervous about asking for the sale, they will instinctively become much more resistant to the sales process, making the sales job much harder. The answer is to learn how to sell from an ethical standpoint, and with the client’s needs firmly at heart.Client RelationshipsThis is where most professional photographers really trip up! They attract the right clients, create beautiful work for them, do a great job of selling it, and then never talk to the client again! This is a huge mistake, and can mean the photographer is stuck in a never-ending quest for new clients. The solution is to stay in touch with your family of valued clients. It’s easy to send them an occasional card in the mail, an email newsletter, or even call them on the telephone just to see how they’re doing.An Upward Spiral To SuccessAs you reach the last of the six pillars, you’ll see that a happy family of clients naturally causes you to be happier as a businessperson, which helps create an even stronger positive attitude.You also get to know your clients in a lot more depth, which then helps you when it comes to positioning yourself and your business in the marketplace.The process of marketing becomes much simpler and a lot less costly, since you’ll see a lot more benefit from word of mouth marketing.The SEO for your photography website is also made much simpler because your blog articles, for example, further help the search engines to see you as a local authority.The sales process becomes easier to manage because you’ve now created a good reputation within the community.Finally, your family of happy clients will love you more as your photography business becomes more established.